Zach
by Elijah Maddoxx
Summary: Derek Morgan relives a haunting event from his immediate past. *Oneshot*


_I'm BACK, with a new Pen Name! Since I got blocked with Redux, I've decided to take up writing oneshots until I can get over the writer's rust, and get my mojo back. I'm gonna need the help of my fellow fanfictioners and readers to help me out by giving me quality reviews and maybe even help me to see what I'm lacking, since it's been a while. lol. Hope you guys enjoy this little piece I've dribbled up. Feels great to be back on here! =D_

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ZACH

He walks through the front door and tosses his go bag across the room before shutting it behind him. He flops down on the couch and gazes at the ceiling. He inhales and exhales repeatedly before letting out a final long sigh and shutting his eyes.

**"Come on, man, put it down!"**

His eyes suddenly open. He continues to lay there for a minute, before closing his eyes again.

**"I said, put it down!"**

His eyes open once more. He looks around the quiet room, as if he was expecting someone else to be in there. Not a person in sight.

He sits up on the couch and folds his hands, bringing them up to his forehead as his face slumps downward. He closes his eyes a third time.

**"Zach, please, listen to me!"**

**"Why?! I can't go to prison for the rest of my life! Nobody cares about what he did to me…what he did to her! LOOK AT HER! LOOK AT HER! If I didn't shoot him, he would have killed me too! But I can't go to prison! I've been through enough, already! I don't want you to think I'm a bad person. I just….I just want out."**

**"Kid…please believe me when I tell you, I do care. What he did was wrong. You or I can't change what happened. If I could go back in time and save you from those beatings, I swear to God, I would in a heartbeat."**

**"…I don't wanna die…"**

**"I don't want you to die either, but with you wielding that gun, you're leaving me with little to no options here, and it's killin me kid. Please…I'm _begging_you to drop the gun and let me help you."**

**"…I can't."**

The sound a gunshot and the sight of blood spattering all over the wall replay in his mind as he falls back against the couch, clenching his teeth and tightening the muscles in his forehead, trying to hold back his emotions.

Zachary Halen's stone dead eyes were a sight that Derek Morgan was sure he could never forget. A painful reminder of some of the not so great moments that come with the burden he has to carry of being a member of the FBI.

He gets up off the couch and walks to the bathroom where he strips down, turns on the water and steps into the shower. He wished at this moment that he could wash the guilt off of him, but he knew that wasn't a reality. He stood braced against the cold hard tile of the shower wall, closing his eyes once more as sudden tears blended with the streaming water.

**"Derek, you had no choice..."**

**"I just murdered an innocent victim, Rossi."**

**"He wasn't innocent. He killed a man."**

**"He killed the man that killed his sister. If that kid hadn't of done what he did, the sick son of a bitch would have probably...he was a victim, Rossi."**

**"A victim doesn't aim a gun at an FBI agent."**

**"How was justice served at all today, man? In the end, who really won?"**

**"Every battle we fight does not necessarily decide a winner or a loser. Sometimes, there's neither. But every day is a chance to hope for better…a chance to be a better person."**

**"I've been doing this job a long time Rossi. I've never, _ever _felt this bad, before."**

**"I've been doing this job since you were in grade school, Derek. I can tell you that you'll have more days like this. It comes with the job. All you can do is go home, deal with it, and try again tomorrow. You'll be alright."**

A man with a scarred childhood past of his own, he was dealing with it the way he had known so well. He wasn't sure how he would feel tomorrow, but he just wanted to get through tonight. He knew from experience that once the tears stopped flowing and he had gained the strength to move on, he would eventually be fine. But he knew that Zach Halen's face would haunt him for a long time to come.


End file.
